Mik's guide to getting hitched

With talk of weddings everywhere at the minute, Mik Scarlet chimes in with the zeitgeist and offers a free wedding planner service for anyone thinking about tying the knot in the future

My wedding day was the best day of my life. I always wanted to get married, especially after I met the wonderful Diane. Having said that, neither of us wanted to throw money at our big day. With sums of £20,000 quoted as the cost of an average wedding, I hope that my tips might help you get the day of your dreams without putting you in penury.

Where to begin? Picking a date. Don’t always rush towards a summer wedding. The summer no longer promises nice weather and it costs more. Pick a time of year that means something to you, but try to be flexible. We picked November 5th, because it meant there would always be fireworks on our anniversary.

Next is venue, both for the ceremony and the reception. Nowadays you can do the whole thing in one place, which is a great idea if access is an issue. Make sure you test out any potential venues and that your venues are available on your wedding date! Try somewhere different. We used a local canal museum, which had great access and caused everyone to comment on how great a venue it was. So think places of local interest.

Once you have the date and venue, the next biggie is The Dress. I think the outfits of the bride and the groom are equally important, so let’s deal with them together. Go simple and custom. Whatever your disability, having your wedding outfit made to fit you makes you feel great. My wife made her own dress, and looked amazing. The current fashion in dresses are for simple lines, with flared A-line silhouette. Suits are single breasted, and it’s very now to wear a waistcoat, thanks to The Mentalist’s Simon Baker.

Now we need to sort the entertainment. I programmed up my laptop with a night’s worth of favourite mp3s, put it through my stereo set-up and pushed play, but I expect some of you would prefer something a bit more grand. All I would say is it needs to be fun.

The cake is another key ingredient, if you excuse the pun. Think local and personal taste. Who likes fruit cake anyway? A good friend of ours plumped for cup cakes, we had a double tier Victoria sponge. I was still eating it weeks afterwards. Then there is booze and food. We got all of our drinkies on a sale or return basis and had veggie only finger food. Our relatives complained about the lack of meat beforehand, but fell on it like locusts.

I designed all the invites myself, using standard publishing software. I printed them on nice paper and they looked super professional, even if I say so myself. Don’t forget to include the important information, like the date, directions to the venue and ask for a RSVP.

As for photographs, get in a professional if you can afford it, but in a world where digital cameras are even on phones, if you like you can rely on relatives. Maybe run a competition for the best piccies?

So with the wedding pretty sorted (don’t forget the rings!), let’s do the honeymoon. A major part of your experience, the honeymoon tends to be one of the biggest expenses. We spent a week in our favourite accessible city, Barcelona, but there are some beautiful and accessible areas here in the UK. Penzance in Cornwall is a personal fave.

Lastly, rely on your best man and maid of honour. Get them involved early on, and trust them to help you if you need it. Don’t try to run the whole event yourselves. We did, and while it saved money, it did cause a few moments of drama.

All of this might seem a bit obvious, but if you box clever you can have a superb day without breaking the bank. We did it all for under £5,000, including honeymoon.

Useful Links

Venues: findaweddingvenue.co.uk;
weddingservices4u.co.uk/county_catsasp2/countymappd.asp

Dresses: sellmyweddingdress.co.uk/database/search.php

Dress Patterns: weddings.lovetoknow.com/wiki/Wedding_Dress_Pattern;
www.marfy.it/eng/activenews.asp

Custom Rings (where I got mine): thegreatfroglondon.com

Cakes: bigweddingcakecompany.co.uk; haveyourcakeandeatit.org

General Advice: hitched.co.uk

Honeymoon:
Cornwall: Scarlet Hotel – award winning accessible hotel with cool name – scarlethotel.co.uk
Queens Hotel (our favourite) – queens-hotel.com

Barcelona: Whotells Apartments, not super accessible but really swish – whotells.com/es
Ambassador Hotel where we spent our honeymoon:
hoteles-silken.com/hotel-ramblas-barcelona/en
Gaudi Hotel (our favourite hotel): hotelgaudibarcelona.com