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Backlash
I've never been to me
The title of Charlene’s slushy ballad of awakening self-discovery seems to find an echo in his life as Paul Carter turns over yet another new leaf
Bladerunner: the staggering truth
What do Paul Carter and Oscar Pistorius have in common? One is fit, clean-livng and may be in line for an Olympic medal. The other is Paul Carter
The horror, the horror
While not shrinking from making a slightly scary confession, Paul Carter ultimately believes that we have, in the words of FDR, nothing to fear but fear itself
A stare way to heaven
Among the many curved balls life throws Paul Carter, none has taken him quite so off guard as a starer’s blessing
Playing the caped crusader
Self-styled “Superstumps” aka Paul Carter this month turns to the business of getting down on the streets
Tapping up a man who can
This month, Paul Carter fesses up to musical inadequacy and finds that he is made an offer he can’t refuse
Waiting for a girl like you
It’s the start of many a beautiful friendship. A chance meeting at a bus stop. But for Paul Carter fate gave it that extra twist
Carter's famous last word
To take his mind off the more frightening aspects of his day-job, Paul Carter has been pondering intimations of his own mortality
Airport insecurity
Even when going on holiday, Paul Carter finds himself being treated just that little bit differently
Citizen Carter's good cause
Though cowards flinch and traitors sneer, Paul Carter is calling us to the barricades, and this time he’s serious
He's finger-lickin' good!
It’s so unlikely, it’s not even anyone’s worst nightmare, but Paul Carter says Libya’s dictator forced food on him
Joys of a stilted childhood
They sat him in the corner with his beanbags, but a circus skills session at school revealed Paul Carter’s hidden talent for getting high
Not quite Torvill and Dean
The recent big freeze not only brought much to Britain to a standstill, it also turned Paul Carter into a reluctant comedy skater
Wheeling towards oblivion
As he's not getting any younger, Paul Carter ponders the choice between walking and wheels
Up against the wall
Even when caught between an angry mob and a scary metal wall, Paul Carter insists he's not vulnerable
Sneeze, fart and kick the dog
When asked whether they'd had disabled people round their's, 90 per cent of people said no. Paul Carter thinks he's figured out why
Hitting the big three-oh
Conscious and sober once again, Paul Carter reflects on a milestone birthday
Carry on camping Carter
As someone who used to think that camping was what Graham Norton and Julian Clary did on TV, Paul Carter was quite surprised by the real thing
Not so grim oop north
A week in Manchester has taught Paul Carter that he's more at home playing away
The great Paralympic wobble
“Failed Paralympian” are two words which now dog Paul Carter. But have they made him bitter? No, he’s up for a whole new challenge
Carter's culinary clutter
Gadget-boy Paul Carter faces up to the realisation that it’s time to put aside all those things which perpetuate the pretence that he’s any kind of kitchen wiz
The doctor dilemma
Even when he’s genuinely under the weather, Paul Carter wrestles with why he’s reluctant to see a doctor
Heather – not just her own worst enemy
Uh-oh. Whenever Heather Mills appears in this magazine we know it can spell trouble. Now Paul Carter’s got his teeth into her…metaphorically only, of course
The guy who came in from the cold
During the new year’s cold weather, Paul Carter found himself a prisoner in his own home with only Hilary Benn to provide crumbs of cold comfort
Deck the Paul...
An ill-advised seasonal trip into London’s West End has convinced Paul Carter that he’s no toy boy
Failing to crack the code
When Paul Carter lost his cash card, little did he know what he was about to get into. Certainly not his own bank account
Why Paul's not playing ball
It used to be called Murderball and apparently, Paul Carter is a shoe-in for stardom playing it. So why is he less than thrilled
Just one big leg-pull
Be careful what you ask Paul Carter, you just might get more than you bargained for as an answer
Paul's falls dent his pride
Just like your average turf legend, Paul Carter requires re-shoeing periodically. Here’s what happens if he leaves it too long
I belong to Glasto!
Despite the mud, the blood, the scrapes and the stench, Paul Carter tells Michael Eavis, I’ll be back!
Get Carter – on the run
Spiked, another great idea as Paul Carter learns his lesson about why he shouldn’t run
Alien in an alien world
While pondering why he turns so many heads, Paul Carter is also wondering why he’s trying to be something he doesn’t want to be in a place he doesn’t want to be in
A three-legged friend
Paul Carter can’t make up his mind whether he fancies an assistance dog or a dog that needs assistance
A bit of armless waving
Feeling left out, Paul Carter’s decided to set up a club we might all give our right arms to join
Sit down stand off
Have you heard the one about the blind guy, the short guy, the one on crutches and the seat, asks Paul Carter
It's a tall, tall world
Despite an absolute disbelief in omens, Paul Carter is beginning to wonder whether his middle name is really Damien
Shoot! Why didn't I think of that?
At last, an American company has come up with a firearm specially designed for disabled gun-toters. Paul Carter is going to look for it at the chemist’s
Here's to the land of the free lunch
The US Presidential brainwashing campaign has worked on me too, says Paul Carter. Now all I need is a free accessible villa with a pool and cocktails and I’m off to LA
Scaling the north face of my toilet
The real story of the Tory conference will have to wait until I publish my memoirs, says Paul Carter. If I survive that long…
Being a celebrity is just pants
Inspirational? Lacking in bitterness? My new stalker clearly doesn’t know me at all, says Paul Carter
I'll pitch a tent on a roundabout
Flat hunting is no fun when you’re bone idle, says Paul Carter. Maybe it’s time to look for office accommodation
It wasn't me. Blame my doppelganger
The thought of running a marathon makes me turn green, says Paul Carter. But not as green as the wristband they made him wear at a music festival
Beware the breakfast mugger
It’s time to turn the tables on pestering strangers, says Paul Carter. From now on, they’ll have to pay to hear his life story
When small is not beautiful
Paul Carter says children are just like students, but it would be easier to talk to them if they learned the offside rule
Strife on the ocean waves
Paul Carter samples maritime access 1860s style and is given a terrifying glimpse into the past and the future
Geek seeks total control
Paul Carter may not be able to use an iPhone but he’d still like to own one
Just not the ticket
I hate London buses at the best of the times. During the day they’re like a nightmarish series of Big Brother, while at night they turn into, well, an even more nightmarish version of Big Brother, except with more nudity.